Has your boss ever leaned round the door, smiled insincerely and asked if they can ‘grab five minutes’ with you?
New research has shown that when a senior member of staff asks you for those 5 minutes, the average actual time taken is 22 minutes and 40 seconds; an effective increase of 453%. The study of these awkward conversations also showed interesting trends within the workplace:
- The longest times for informal one-to-one chats were recorded among bosses who suffer from halitosis and other personal hygiene issues – these can often exceed 43 minutes, particularly in enclosed places like stationery cupboards, broom cupboards or broken lifts.
- At the other end of the scale, attractive lady bosses recorded the lowest figures, generally succeeding in confining their chat to within the 5 minute window.
- It is thought that these brief, awkward chats cost the UK economy over £2bn per year in missed meetings, unanswered emails, and missed time spent on Facebook.
- The research also found that if you were asked if you ‘have 5 minutes’, there is a 4% chance that you are about to be fired, and 2.5% that you are about to be sexually propositioned, offered illegal drugs, or Coldplay concert tickets.
“On balance, there is good reason for avoiding these little chats”, said HR guru Roy Dundant. “They take up way more time than initially promised, and it’s pretty much a certainty that you’re in trouble, something terrible is going to happen, or that you’re going to be given some work to do. The chances of getting a pay rise, or being told that Kerry in Finance has finally split up from her boyfriend are so infinitesimally tiny, it is not worth the trouble of attending. My advice is to ignore the request, and point out that you are not contractually obliged to be ‘grabbed’ in this way, and that a proper meeting be diarised.”
Still, business has yet to sink to the levels experienced on the high street – in a recent study, one female shopper in Leicester was heard to be “nipping into TK Maxx for 5 minutes”, and was next seen 3 days later, bankrupt, delirious and suffering from dehydration.

Research also shows that there’s a 78% chance that the ‘we’ used in ‘can we just…’ is not the Royal We (‘I’) or Prosaic We (‘You and I’) but the ‘Imperial We’ form (i.e. ‘You’).
A sophisticated way to approach somebody.Take care! you are likely to be exploited.
Good blogging!
It is an issue I must do more research into, many thanks for the article.
An under-discussed issue that needed outing, thanks Madeup.
I seriously learned about most of this, but however, I still assumed it had been valuable. Good post!
Honesty is the best policy.
In for a penny, in for a pound.
I’m extremely impressed with your writing skills as well as with the layout on your blog. Is this a paid theme or did you customize it yourself? Either way keep up the nice quality writing, it is rare to see a great blog like this one nowadays..
Forewarned is forearmed.
Robert’s (Bob’s) your uncle, Fanny’s your aunt.
Awesome post, good web page design and style, maintain the good work
Large addict from this page, a great deal of your blogposts have truly helped me out. Looking forward to improvements!
Saved, I love your blog!
howdy, superb post, and a fairly good understand! 1 for my bookmarking.
… quick 5 minute chats can be fun! Looking fwd 2 a quick chat when you’re back
You will find heel Lifts accessible in a wide selection of materials
shoe lifts
heel Lifts and Achilles tendon therapy may also be used for circumstances associated to injury from sports or from chronic inflammation from the tendon
shoe lifts
Whenever shoe or shoe lifts insoles are used, the footwear from the user will become like a ladies’ high heel shoe, the heel is in an elevated position therefore growing the height from the wearer or balancing the lengths of legs that are unequal
http://louisetv.com/phpmotion/read_blog/8466/heel-lifts-and-physical-activities-could-they-be-safe
That was more than 20 years ago and I’m still a user of heel Lifts, I’m although, now amazed in the improvements produced towards the miracle item
http://rcgiannini.com/investorboard/index.php/alfredibr
According to the Journal of Healthcare and Biological Engineering “heel Lifts are able to right the leg-length discrepancies (LLDs) and relieve limp gaits of individuals with unilateral developmental dysplasia from the hip (DDH)
http://murphystudio.com/modules/profile/userinfo.php?uid=1927
Hello. And Bye.
The shoe lifts insoles ought to be worn regularly regardless of the type of shoes you put on
http://ezinepr.com/health-medicine/conditions-medical/i-am-happy-i-am-taller/
shoe lifts insoles are certainly one of the simplest ways to improve your gait and improve your height immediately
http://www.montessoriofcasper.com/index.php?/member/3973/
heel Lifts are a great purchase, low cost heel Lifts that offer total manage and elevated confidentiality
http://www.easysurftrips.com/index.php/member/35471/
Your shoes will also have an impact on the comfort of your shoe lifts
http://www.efeonline.org/user/view.php?id=6845&course=1
http://dukeaward.ca/?q=node/354116